Gayblack Canadian Man

Foreign Policy Analysis
International Relations

International Relations


CANADA!
USA! OH, HEY THERE.
IT’S BEEN AWHILE, HOW ARE YOUR PROVINCES? OH, THEY GROW UP SO FAST.
YOU KNOW, I GOT MY HANDS FULL WITH 10, I DON’T KNOW HOW YOU TAKE CARE OF 50 STATES.
YEAH, YOU KNOW, IT’S NOT EASY, THE SOUTHERN ONES WENT THROUGH A REBELLIOUS
PHASE. AND WHAT ABOUT THE ADOPTED ONES?
OH, ALASKA AND HAWAII? YEAH, I HAVEN’T TOLD THEM YET, BUT I THINK
THEY’VE FIGURED IT OUT BY NOW.
AND THE REALLY LOUD ONE? TEXAS IS STILL TEXAS.
OH, CANADA, WE SHOULD YOU KNOW, HANG OUT SOMETIME, MAYBE PLAY SOME BASEBALL
– PLAY SOME HOCKEY.
WHAT? WHAT’S BASEBALL?
[PHONE RINGING] OH, SORRY, I GOT TO GET THIS. OKAY.
CHINA, BABY, HOW’S IT GOING? YES, I KNOW I OWE YOU A LOT OF MONEY.
ALWAYS MAKING IT ABOUT MONEY. YOU KNOW WHAT, LISTEN.
I WILL GET IT TO YOU TOMORROW. DO YOU HAVE LIKE FOUR TRILLION DOLLARS
I COULD BORROW? WHAT AM I SAYING, YOU’RE CANADA.
OKAY, LISTEN. I WILL GIVE YOU MY WATCH UNTIL I CAN PAY.
THAT’S RIGHT, YOU DID MAKE THIS. CHINA, YOU CAN’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.
OKAY, I WILL DO THAT, BYE. BESTIES, OH, HIDE ME.
WHAT? OH COME ON, YOU GUYS HAVEN’T
DATED SINCE ‘76. I KNOW, BUT IT’S SO AWKWARD.
WELL, I TOLD YOU TO BREAK UP WITH HIM IN PERSON, AND NOT OVER DECLARATION.
COME ON, YOU CAN DO THIS. I’VE GOT SOME HOCKEY STUFF TO PURCHASE.
OH, HI, USA, DIDN’T EVEN SEE YOU THERE, WHICH IS WEIRD, BECAUSE YOU’VE PUT
ON A LOT OF LAND. HI, BRITAIN.
YOU KNOW, I’VE JUST FELT SO FREE THE LAST FEW CENTURIES,
WHAT WITH THE BREAKUP AND ALL, NEVER LOOKED BACK.
YOU TRIED TO GET BACK TOGETHER IN 1812. YES, WELL, ANYWAY, I’VE JUST BEEN HAVING
SO MUCH SUCCESS LATELY, WITH THE BEATLES AND
HARRY POTTER AND DOWNTON ABBEY. I DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT US ANYMORE.
THAT’S GREAT. TAKE ME BACK, PLEASE?
BRITAIN – IS IT ANOTHER MAN? IS IT FRANCE?
OH, GROSS, NO. [SPEAKING FRENCH] THEN WHAT IS IT?
GIVE ME A REASON. OKAY, YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?
I WILL TELL YOU – NORTH KOREA. HELLO FOREIGN SCUM.
[SPEAKING KOREAN] YOU WANT TO SEE? OH!
DO I OR DON’T I? JUST PAY ME SOME ATTENTION!
OKAY, I WILL TELL YOU WHY. WHEN WE DATED, THE SUN NEVER SET
ON YOUR CHEATING. YOU MADE A PASS AT EVERY COUNTRY YOU SAW!
AUSTRALIA, INDIA, BAHAMAS. MMM, BAHAMAS.
OKAY. AND THEN THERE’S JUST RESPECT, I CAN’T
DATE A GUY THAT I’VE BEATEN IN WAR.
OKAY, I WAS NOT TRYING MY HARDEST. DESPERATE, OKAY?
WE BROKE UP AND YOU FOUND EVERY EXCUSE YOU COULD
TO GET ME OVER, LIKE OH, USA, I’M HAVING A WAR,
OH, COME HELP ME, OH, USA. I’M HAVING ANOTHER WAR, OH, I’M HAVING
AN OLYMPICS, COME DESTROY ME IN EVERY EVENT.
OH. DESPERATE.
AM I RIGHT, SWITZERLAND? I’M STAYING OUT OF THIS.
LOOK ME IN THE EYES AND TELL ME YOU’RE OVER IT.
I’M OVER IT. OWIE.
LOOK, I CELEBRATE OUR BREAKUP WITH FIREWORKS, OKAY,
I BLOW THINGS UP. FINE, THEN.
I DON’T NEED YOU OR YOUR BAD CREDIT. OKAY, I DON’T NEED A BOYFRIEND WHO PLAYS
THE WRONG FOOTBALL. OH, RIGHT, I’LL SEE YOU LATER,
HAVE A GOOD OBESITY EPIDEMIC. GET A DENTAL PLAN.
WHICH WAY DID CANADA? THAT WAY.
OH, CANADA!

100 comments on “International Relations

  1. Fun cause britian has better teeth that US, it has the joint best teeth in the world along with germany, also i love this stupid american propaganda 😂😂😂😂😂😂

  2. Football? Wait you mean that sport called hand egg. Yeah. Oh and the other football that literally everyone calls it by football. Yeah its called foot ball for a reason. You kick an ACTUAL BALL with your

    You guess FOOT. OMG is it that hard to understand. American football is a foot long but you wont call Frisbee like 7 inche disk. Wtf

  3. what is this obbsession with laughing effects is annoying
    americans and british are same in this at least i know when to laugh

  4. So if USA is England's child, Canada is like a love child between England and France, and then were neglected and so they just followed their older rebellious sister USA around and tried to be just like them, but failed and ended up super nice and befriending everyone.

  5. In 1812 ya daft Yanks, the Americans attacked Britain in hopes of driving out Britain of Canada and thus supporting Napoleon's efforts in Europe. This ultimately failed and lead to the burning of the White House! Don't make it out that we attacked you guys or something, we didn't want that land back, by 1812 we were thriving in India which was the apple of our eye. What happened @StudioC was you Yanks tried to bet us, and of course failed, now you like to portray it as us failing to take you back. Same with your independence, all lies you tell yourselves to feel happy.

  6. "I can't date a guy I've beaten in war" pppfffttt hahahahahahah! France beat us love, not Americans, FRANCE! Without France America would be nothing, but they love to forget it.

  7. WHAT MAKES AMERICAN PEOPLE THINK BRITISH PEOPLE TALK LIKE THAT WE DON'T AND IF I SEE ONE MORE VIDEO WITH THAT ACCENT I WILL GO CRAZY

  8. Nice idea, concept and so on… first i dint get second a little third i was like "Wow..How com i dint get dis"..😂

  9. King George III: You'll be Back
    Matt: Please take me back!!!
    King George III: WHA- NOOO!!! YOU AREN'T SUPPOSED TO DO THAT!!! YOU DISGRACE!!!

  10. Well America plays the wrong football cause in the name it says "FOOT" ball which means that you use your foot which the Americans dont.

  11. The US is history's spoilt child, Britain went bankrupt defending them from France, and France went bankrupt defending them from Britain when they wanted their money back, and they've made fun of both of them ever since.

  12. When USA said that she won the war against Britain, that would have been the perfect moment for France to appear and say something like: a thank you France once in a while wouldn't hurt you darling.
    Seriously to think that a bunch of farmers actually defeated the greatest empire of the time is quite funny.

  13. HAHAHAHA that was so funny I loved how Matt had the fake teeth IT DIDNT EVEN LOOK LIKE MATT I watch your videos everyday!!

  14. … Heh… The USA think we miss them, that's funny, I'm pretty sure whenever they come up in conversation they tend to be the butt of a joke.

    Sorry to break it to ya guys but we're about as much a fan of yours as we are ourselves at the moment, and that is… Well, not in the highest esteem to say the least…

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